By Michael McCarthy
The brain is a most curious creature. This tiny lump of gray matter in your skull combines intellect, ego and intuition all in one clever package, and when those three components are in sync good things are known to happen. But standing on the edge of a 1,600-foot free fall at Whistler’s Cougar Mountain zipline, when my ego said “go” and my intellect said “you paid all this dough,” my intuition countered: “You must be kidding!”
For those not in the know, ziplining is a wild new adventure experience, not unlike bungee jumping or parachuting, that involves strapping yourself to a harness attached to a long cable hung between trees and “flying” along the line at very high speeds. It’s an awful lot of fun as long as you are not afraid of great heights, incredible speed and the sense of utter dread that creeps into your brain on the edge of a gigantic precipice when your intuition tells you that you are doing something very dangerous and stupid, and wouldn’t you rather be home relaxing in your favorite genuine imitation naughahyde lazyboy watching a football game on TV and stuffing your face full of cheese nachos?
Whistler has steadily grown into the world’s largest four-season destination, with summer recently surpassing winter in terms of tourist dollars spent. Visitors from around the world come to the resort for mountain biking, glacier hiking, golf, tennis, river rafting, fine dining, heli-skiing, windsurfing, bungee jumping, flight seeing and jet boating. All these wonderful activities have one thing in common; they cost a fortune.
For many who want a week in Whistler the problem is affording the vacation without mortgaging your house. Recently I put together a budget vacation so clever that I must have been using parts of my brain that had been on holiday for years.
The trick lies in finding affordable accommodations, and the insider’s secret is renting a condo, with kitchen and all the fixin’s, from an owner happy to fill empty space in the so-called “off months.”
Some casual surfing located a lovely one-bedroom suite just five minutes from downtown. This brings up secret number two; stash your car in the owner’s parking space and use the multipurpose, paved valley trails for all your walking and biking. The Resort Municipality of Whistler may be the best-designed townsite in the world. In a few minutes you can cycle anywhere you want, and it seems everyone does. Biking is not only fun, it’s completely free.
We explored many corners of the flat valley floor by bicycle, packing picnic lunches to many of the valley’s exquisite lakes and parks. We strolled the village plazas and watched hundreds of crazy mountain bikers flying down the ski hill at the amazing Whistler Bike Park, the world’s largest. The bikers paid $49 a day to ride the lifts; we watched for free.
With all the money saved, I bought two passes for Skyline at Cougar Mountain. Staff claims that Skyline’s tandem ziplines are the world’s fastest. Standing on the precipice of a line called Godzilla and about to step off into the void, I wasn’t about to argue.
“We’ve had people stand there for 15 minutes trying to decide if they were going to step off,” said our amiable guide, as I stood there paralyzed, “but we’ve only had one person actually chicken out and go home.”
With my 13-year old son taunting me from his tandem line five feet away, I realized I had no choice. Either I could crawl home in shame, or launch myself over the cliff like Evil Knievel. I swallowed hard and nodded.
“Three, two, one,” counted off our guide, and I threw myself off the edge. People who have jumped off bridges (and lived) have related that the instant they jumped they realized their mistake. Now I understand. There was a sudden moment of extreme terror and within seconds I was flying through the air at a fantastic speed. I zipped by my son like he was a Wichita lineman waiting for Glen Campbell to call home, collect.
In the distance the landing platform suddenly appeared and I remembered the old cliché about skydiving. “It’s not the drop that kills you, it’s the sudden stop at the end.” Our guide had patiently explained the need to “starfish” when flying, spreading your arms and legs out to create air drag, thereby slowing your speed. Otherwise you’ll hit the other end like a freight train.
On the Godzilla line, flyers can hit speeds up to 100 kilometres per hour, depending on weight and posture. I found myself unable to drop my legs into the required posture. I couldn’t even pry my fingers off the handle to do the starfish. I did the turtle instead. At 215 pounds, it appears I may have set a new airspeed record for Godzilla. Conveniently, since I was already curled up into a ball, I was perfectly positioned for the recommended landing position, hitting the cushion springs like a rocket and bouncing to my feet like the Energizer Bunny.
“Yes, yes, yes!” I yelled at the top of my lungs, and sprinted for the next take-off platform, my heart racing. The intellect may act as a stabilizing device in the brain, but it’s really no match for the ego. For we fabulous, fearless zipline flyers, the sky is truly the limit. Me, I’m already saving my pennies for next time.
For more information about Whistler activities log on to www.whistler.com. Click on Activities to find zipline tours. Discounts to many activities can be found at www.activitiescentral.com. Condo rentals can be arranged through www.ResortAc.com. Our lovely $95 suite at Northstar was rented privately from Beatrice Ciolfitto at 604-340-1103.